A Chat with Eve Waltermaurer &
Hazel Gurland, about their film FIRST

It was a sweet e-mail I was forwarded by a friend, basically an invitation to come down to New York City on a Saturday night for an evening of short films about sex. (I don’t usually open emails that appear to be of this nature, by the way.) Not being immune to curiosity about the subject, I replied to the sender for more information. It’s important to follow up on this sort of thing.

My response led to a pleasant late autumn discussion in High Falls with Eve Waltermaurer and Hazel Gurland, the directors and producers of FIRST, a documentary of interviews with ten women describing the iconic moment of losing their virginity. It’s a well-paced, non-prurient film that re-affirms the wonder of female sexuality, a kaleidoscope of stories connected by the significant “first time.”

OK I was, to be honest, a wee bit nervous at first, fidgeting and garbling sentences. I’m suddenly aware that I have (very) rarely in my life discussed sex with women I’ve never met before. Their warmly bemused laughter put me at ease immediately. Fortunately, friendly laughing women have always had that effect on me.

The genesis of this film project started with Eve (pardon the pun). For the last five years, she’s been a professor of sociology at SUNY New Paltz, teaching courses in criminology, research, and statistics. She’s a social epidemiologist whose course of study is violence, particularly violence toward women. Needing a break from the heaviness of that subject, Eve wanted to follow her interest in women’s health issues toward a more positive direction. What could be more positive than that first moment of sexual awakening?

“What got me excited about this topic in the first place was hanging out with a bunch of girlfriends, just talking about our virginity stories, and cracking up. Loving to listen to someone else, and loving to tell your own stories, and it was really exciting and fun, and everyone got to be entertaining and entertained at the same time.”

“I started interviews as for a book. I thought I wanted to do a light, easy reader kind of book that talked about virginity stories, but in a much less academic way. I’ve always been interested in getting knowledge and information to the mass public in a way that’s NOT just academic, that you would have to learn in a classroom with a professor. I was actually picturing a bathroom reader—something light and funny, easy to read, that would be accessible to young girls.” When she ran the concept by good friend and locally-based filmmaker Robert Stone, he recommended presenting it as a film, and introduced her to fellow filmmaker Hazel Gurland. This turned out to be a fortuitous meeting.

Like Eve, Hazel was New York City born and raised, and came upstate to study at Bard College, majoring in literature and gender studies. After finishing her education at Columbia, studying journalism, she became discouraged with print media—“people weren’t reading enough!”—and got involved with the more immediate media of television and film. This interest brought her back upstate to work with the aforementioned Robert Stone, and Hazel found a kindred spirit in Eve, and an interest in the virginity project. Hazel: “We felt like, as women, it would be better for us to do it together, we might be able to have better interactions with our subjects without having them apprehensive and nervous.” It was a good match, with Eve asking the questions, and Hazel with the camera and editing expertise.

The women who consented to be interviewed were mostly friends of Eve’s and Hazel’s. Eve: “We were looking for a variety of age, race, and ethnicity. And experience; it wouldn’t be that interesting if these were all prudes, or all easy-going women. We wanted to show as best as we can, in a short period of time, the different types of women, different types of stories.” The movie was, for the most part, women speaking to a single camera, which meant that there were also visual considerations when choosing the interviewees.

Hazel: “At one point, we thought we could have a bunch of people, sitting together on their beds, talking. But then, we were getting people separately, and it kind of evolved. But I think it was fun; we wanted it to be a peek into a bedroom of girls gossiping...but not have it be too crazy.” Each woman addresses the camera and interviewer sitting on their own bed, in their own room. The intimate setting certainly puts them at ease, making it possible to get their stories across.

So I ask the inevitable question: is this just for women, or is it a film men should see also? Both women answer strongly in the affirmative. Eve: “Oh, absolutely. Men enjoy it. It has its titillating things, but it also has its informative things, where you say, ‘oh, I had no idea!’ There were common patterns, common things women felt. I think it’s very important for men to realize that. Pleasure and education…all mixed together!”

Well, I like pleasure in my education, so I took some time to watch FIRST. With a tastefully jazzy soundtrack from Rebecca Coupe Franks, it was a fun and revealing film that disarms you from the start. The ten brave and interesting women are introduced in short order, and the film moves circularly through their stories, starting with generalities, then working its way through first kisses, first contact, then the actual act itself, which more often than not proved to be somewhat anti-climatic. For some women, it was pleasurable, others painful. But for all, it was a crucial moment of self-discovery, an unforgettable rite of passage. Most stories were funny, sometimes in a wistfully sad way.

There’s a real freedom in seeing and hearing people talk frankly about this subject. Eve: “The fact that people don’t talk about it, about their sexuality in general, it leads people to thinking that the thoughts that they have are weird, and it’s just them [that have them]. I think that one of the nice things about this film is that it shows women—and men—that things that make you comfortable, make you feel good, make you feel freaked out…you’re not an anomaly, you’re not a freak. Everybody’s unique, but there are a lot of these similarities. I think it’s useful to understand that you’re not alone.”

Response has been almost overwhelming at recent screenings, with random people coming up to them after the films, and pouring out their own stories. Question and answer sessions usually have people opening up in front of a room full of strangers, sometimes even with harrowing tales of assault. One acquaintance who works in prison education wants to show it to male prisoners, to help them express deep-set feelings. This movie does have a tendency to make one feel comfortable about doing so—Hazel tells me I will no doubt have the same impulse after watching FIRST, and she’s right. (I’m just not telling you, Roll reader.)

And though some of the women who told their stories are not interested in watching themselves in this movie, all are excited about having participated. Eve and Hazel see possibilities in taking the interviews further, hearing more stories from more women, possibly even men at some point, if the interest is there. The concept does lend itself to serialization, on possibly HBO or the Oxygen Channel. They’ve shown at film festivals in Eugene, Austin, and Hawaii, where they were greeted with an “R” rating. Hazel: “Part of the idea is that we were trying to get people to talk about sex and sexuality, and have it be not such a taboo, ‘R’ rated thing. It’s not like they’re acting it out or doing anything crazy there; they’re just talking about their story.” Eve: “I don’t think we even have a curse word!” More upcoming screenings are planned, and there have been bites for distribution, but nothing concrete as of this printing.

Seriously though, it’s a film worth seeing, or at the very least, a concept worth exploring…if you haven’t already. One thing that arises throughout the discussion is how little information has been available about sex to people over the years. And once you get past the sometimes embarrassing remembrances, there’s some great humor there. Eve has the right idea: the film is “just fun. It’s funny, it’s fun to watch…it’s pleasurable. We think that you’ll learn something whether you like it or not, it always leads to conversations, where people learn without even knowing it.”

FIRST will be screened with other short films about sex on Saturday January 3rd, at the Courthouse Theater Anthology Film Archives, 32 2nd Avenue, NYC, at 6 PM.

Check Eve and Hazel’s website at walgurl.googlepages.com.